Sunday, September 19, 2010

Things not to do in Disneyland

Saw this picture recently and it reminded me of a few of the stunts I used to pull at Disneyland in my younger days. Not that I'm proud of any of these of course. Tom Sawyer's Island had all those little caves and crevices. Ideal for smoking illegal substances. In the late 60's, nine out of ten teenagers would enter the park and head right for Tom Sawyer's. There could be no lines for Pirates of the Caribbean, we'd still pass it by in favor of the island.

There used to be an exhibit called "Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln". A Lincoln robot would get up from a chair and deliver an eloquent speech. One time I got loaded and stood up in the middle and asked him a question. This did not sit well with others in the house.

By the way, the original Lincoln robot used to have bizarre spasms in the middle of his speech. It was discovered that the show's power supply was fed by the same sub station that fed 600 volts to the Monorail. Whenever the Monorail, ran in these sections, there would be a power surge, causing old Abe to become Jerry Lewis.

Crashing into people on the Autopia. They weren't designed to be bumper cars per se but if my friend was in the car just ahead of me -- whiplash city!

The big thing was (and is) to get Mickey Mouse hats with your name personally embroidered on it. I once slipped a guy $5 and he agreed to write "Charles Manson". This was not a big hit with Magic Kingdom patrons either.

And finally, one year I got another set of Mouse ears and had them write "Vincent" on the hat. I then tore off one of the ears. Those that got the joke were hysterical. The other 90% of Disneylan
d guests either scoffed, were confused, or just ignored me to get in line for churros.

Warning to Disneyland: The Levines will be invading you again the end of this month.

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